Man Who Lost Wife On 9/11 Dies
Man who lost wife on 9/11 dies
http://www.thejournalnews.com/apps/p...507280369/1018
By EILEEN MARKEY
7/28/2005
YONKERS — Timothy Langer, who lost his pregnant wife in the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks at the World Trade Center, died Monday of liver failure at age 34.
His family is calling him an indirect victim of the attacks.
"He didn't quite know how to plug back into life," his brother, Thomas Langer, 35, said. "He had big shoulders that he carried all that pain with — and I say that's poison. In my opinion, that's what killed him."
Elaine Langer, his mother, said the death of his wife and unborn child destroyed her son.
"He was happy, he was well-adjusted. He just couldn't cope with the pain. He self-medicated," she said yesterday amid funeral preparations. "He was a wonderful kid. He was the life of the party. Everyone would talk to him, and then they would go away happy. Unfortunately, Timmy just carried all that pain. He couldn't get rid of it."
Langer, who ran in Internet business, called his mother every morning and every night to see how she was, she said tearfully. "You don't get too many sons like that. He was a sweet, sweet kid."
In his early 20s, Langer suffered a catastrophic motorcycle accident that left him paralyzed below the chest. Doctors gave him a 2 percent chance of recovery, his mother said. But with hope and determination, he learned to walk again.
She chuckled as she recalled the scene in Nyack Hospital last week — nurses gathered around his bed after their shifts because he was so charismatic.
Thomas Langer described his brother as a guy who knew how to have fun, surrounded himself with friends and made other people's worries dissipate — but who was angry at God and in anguished pain after the death of his wife, who was four months' pregnant.
"Imagine buying the crib, and then you've got to come home and see an empty crib," Thomas Langer said. "There was just so much fallout."
Timothy Langer had to endure two funeral rituals for his wife. Shortly after the terror strikes, the family held a memorial service with ashes from the World Trade Center.
Then in January 2002, the New York City coroner's office informed Timothy that his wife's body had been recovered.
"I mean having to go through a funeral twice," Thomas Langer said. "They say everyone grieves at their own pace. This would have taken another five years to heal."
Andrea Berry, a licensed clinical social worker at Voices of September 11, an advocacy group for those affected by the attacks, said alcohol and substance abuse is common among survivors.
"Certainly, we have worked with family members and others involved in the attacks who have developed problems with alcohol. It's certainly prevalent," she said.
"He would drink," Thomas Langer said. "The liver is not forgiving. It wasn't like he was a drunk. He wasn't in rehab or anything. But we've got to look at all of it."
Langer was diagnosed with liver failure two weeks ago, after he became severely jaundiced.
Despite the grief, in talking about his brother, Thomas Langer could not help but smile when he recounted the life he shared with Timothy — from playing football as children, to lifeguarding together at Harriman State Park as teens, to celebrating his wedding after Timothy and Vanessa eloped to Cape May, N.J.
"He was such a great guy," he said. "We were best friends. He's going to be really missed by a lot of people. The hole that's there as a result of him passing is going to be a big one."
